"I sense a great disturbance in the blogosphere, young Jedi."
"What is it, my master?"
"It's the baby boomers, young one. They're aging, and they seem incapable of doing it quietly."
We boomers can't do anything without making a production out of it. The prez just turned 60, prompting every reporter of similar vintage to pontificate about the aging of the boomers. Over at Preacher Mike's place, you can find three posts* (so far)--complete with personal reflections and inspiring quotations--counting down to his 50th birthday. Age-wise, I'm in between Mike and W; well OK, a tad bit closer to W, truth be known. So who am I to buck the trend? No card-carrying baby boomer would ever let a significant life event pass by without waxing introspective and loquacious (in that order), under the false assumption that a World War II vet or Gen Xer somewhere gives a hang.
To any non-boomers still reading this: you need to know that whatever we boomers do is, by definition, cool--much cooler than when previous generations had the same experience. When we had sex, it was cool. The only cool thing about our parents having sex was that we resulted. Teenage alienation and rebellion? For us that was really cool; after all, we were challenging the establishment. When our kids rebelled, it wasn't cool; they were being spoiled brats. Asset accumulation and corporate ladder-climbing also became cool, once we got comfortable with being the establishment. (And no, we didn't "sell out." It's just that Michael Douglas's "greed is good" speech in Wall Street opened up a whole new perspective for us.)
Now getting old, which used to suck bilge water, is really cool because we're the ones doing it. Boomer blog after boomer blog trumpets the marvelous perspective, peace of mind and contentment that come with advancing age, rendering wrinkles, flab and arthritis mere superficial annoyances. Well guess what, campers? It's true. I am more comfortable in my sagging, at-risk-for-melanoma skin than ever. I wouldn't trade 55 for any other age I've been so far. But let's be honest; it ain't all sweetness and light, either. There are some frustrating realities about aging.
You want to know the hardest part for me? It's facing the truth of Frost's Generational Axiom #1, which states, "Each new generation instinctively understands stuff that the older generation can grasp--if at all--only after a thorough explanation." I only recently formulated the axiom, but I've observed the principle behind it for decades. Remember Archie and Edith Bunker from All In the Family? Their perspective, which seemed so normal and right to them, would elicit groans and eye-rolls from Michael and Gloria. No matter how much Michael tried to explain things to his father-in-law, Archie couldn't see the obvious. The only thing obvious to Archie was that Michael was a Meathead. And Edith, who really wanted to understand, just didn't have enough brainpower to get it. We boomers laughed along with Michael and Gloria; we all knew older people like the Bunkers, for whom no amount of reasoning would suffice to make them to see the obvious.
But now, it's my generation that doesn't get it. And I'm not just talking X-Boxes and programmable remotes here. Turns out, our whole world view is a bit dated. Check out James Wiser's insightful description of what his generation "gets" that we boomers need to have explained to us. Consequently, now I'm getting eye-rolls from the younger generation, and I dag-nab hate it. The first time I recall it happening, my daughter was in high school. I referred to one of her friends as an Oriental girl. Caren was mortified.
"Dad," she scolded, rolling her eyes, "she's Asian!"
"Of course she is," I replied. "I occidentally misspoke." More eye rolls. And since then it's only picked up steam. Increasingly, I get those looks from younger members of my congregation. You know: the condescending, "I'm-just-humoring-you-because-I-wouldn't-know-how-to-begin-to-straighten-you-out" look. I know it well, for as a young man I bestowed it countless times on my elders.
I recently read what I thought was a very challenging book about the future of the church. When I shared it with our youth minister, his reaction was, "you didn't know this stuff? I thought it was pretty obvious."
Meathead.
*Links to Preacher Mike's countdown to 50:
Turning 50 this Year
Twenty Days and Counting
As the Day Approaches
4 comments:
Boy can I ever relate to this one -- and I'm only 42 years old! I'm trying so hard to understand and connect to the younger generation, but it seems like the gap is just growing.
They seem to relate to my sermons (at least they tell me they do), but the disconnect seems to be in more informal teaching settings and in casual conversation.
I'm not sure exactly what to do about it.
About 20 years ago, I think, the characters in Doonesbury were discussing the Baby Boomers. One of them said that we will know the Boomers are on the way out when the news starts talking about the "Hot New Funeral Parlors".
"...gives a hang"!!?? What is the obscure old-person meaning of "gives a hang"? I can only imagine that it is some archaic stand-in for proper cursing invented by overly religious old people. Probably Church of Christers.
That phrase is definitely un-cool -- and surely not only to those of us from more recent generations. I suspect that many of your fellow boomers would also take great offense to the phrase "gives a hang," especially if uttered while undertaking the challenge of one's establishment. But I guess your relative un-coolness is another topic for discussion at a later date.
Part of the older generation's responsibilities are to become un-cool so that the younger generation can grow and discover new ideas and new ways of thinking. The older generation will always question the wisdom of the younger generation, and the younger will criticize the stagnation of the older. This keeps science, arts, culture, philosophy, religion, etc. growing so that meaning can infiltrate each individual's understanding of society -- both young and old. It's the circle of life.
These are just the impromptu and stream-of-consciousness thoughts of a Gen X-er. If you don't like it, then in the full spirit of anti-establishment rhetoric, I don't give a hang.
Actually, "don't give a hang" is a euphemism for "don't give a rip." :-)
I'm glad I'm doing so well at fulfilling my mission of becoming increasingly uncool. I agree that the interplay between generations, though sometimes tense, is healthy. I benefit from the challenging interactions I have with people of younger generations, and never want to cut myself off from their perspectives. And yes, that is the circle of life. It just takes a little time to adjust to being on the other side of the circle from where I once was.
As for my choice of wording: I talk like I talk. Is it because I'm the product of old, blue-nosed religious prudes? Likely. Do I care? Not really. If my language sounds archaic and inauthentic to someone, that's OK. If I consciously changed it to fit the expectations of others, it would feel inauthentic to me.
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